The NZ Experience

From the 10-17/08/06 Captain Tom, Segar, “Al” Desira, Haynesy, Conradical, Luke and I travelled to New Zealand Sth Island for 8 days of fun, adventure and snow boarding! We flew in and stayed the first night in Christchurch before embarking on a road trip to Queenstown where we stayed the next five nights, returned to Christchurch for the final night and explored the Christchurch CBD on our final day departing Christchurch for Melbourne at 3:25 pm. A full trip Itinerary can be view here.

Night 1: Arrive in Christchurch (view photo set here)

Our flight departed Melbourne at 5:50 pm, we arrived at the airport at 4:30 pm it took 60 mins to make our way though customs (showing passport 5 different times in a 20 meter space) and stocking up with duty free alcohol (three 1 litre bottles allowed to enter NZ). The trip was almost over before it started for Tom, Segar and Stevie D missing their boarding calls and holding up the entire plane whilst negotiating their tricky duty free choices…

Arriving in Christchurch at 11:05 pm local time showing passport an additional 5-6 times and customs discovering that “yes” I am still James Murphy we called the hotel bus to come pick us up. The bus come, packed our bags then drove us across the car park to where the hotel was… It would have been a 5 minute walk…

Christchurch CBD was a 20 min taxi ride away so the boys decided to have a night in and make use of duty free alcohol. A room service call went out for two large bottles of coke, the matredee delivered two 300 ml bottles of coke priced at $NZ 5 each!!! Further investigation revealed a hotel vending machine return better value with cans of coke selling for $NZ 2. A shortage of NZ coinage meant the purchase of only 6 cans.

A shortage of coke meant that judge “Pukey” Coulter generously dolled out a thimble full of coke to stain each glass of Scotch, Bacardi or Bourbon a dark brown colour.

The signs were not good as the high consumption of alcohol lead to some unruly behaviour, cameos made by “little” friends, gay innuendo and the mysterious appearance of a “genie!!!” Whilst all some people (including the neighbours by the complaints) just wanted to sleep!!!

The carnage for the night was 1 liter bottle of Jim Beam and Black Douglas, ¾ of litre bottle of Bacardi, 6 cans of coke and two 300ml bottles of coke. The carnage continued the next morning with Stevie D waking to find “a awful chunky taste in the back of my (his) throat, which is really weird because I (he) doesn’t remember spewing last night…” after a long wait a Steve rolls over to get comfortable... ”Oh… That explains it…”

Day 2: Road Trip to Queenstown (view photo set here)

Friday we undertook the 484 Km's road trip from Christchurch to Queenstown. Hired two cars a Subaru Legend and a Nissan Bluebird (yes! turns out they still make em) for the journey. Navigator Haynes (amongst other occupations), Wingman (or Assassin???) Tom, Segar and I lead the way in the Legend whilst Conradical, “Al” Desira and Pukey followed in the Bluebird.

The drive was picturesque with plenty of panoramic or aka “tomoramic” views, the name was due to Tom's constant referencing, taking photos and videos (refer to Tom blog if further explanation is necessary).

Some excitement/panic was added to the journey when a eagle swooped meters in front of the car to collect some road kill, I made the comment, “we are a chance of hitting this…” but never expected to come as close as we did! The eagle got to windscreen height less then half a meter away from the car, we all seen the panic in the eagles eyes, Haynesy screamed jumped onto my side of the car, Tom and Segar ducked for cover as we narrowly avoided the bird… I was later complemented for not swerving and staying in control of the car, I did not have the heart to tell everyone I had closed my eyes and hoped for the best… I still don’t know how we missed… Apologies no one was quick enough to get a photo…

The irony of the eagle swooping to get road kill only to become road kill was missed but not forgotten.

We stopped for lunch 2 hours into the drive at a small town at the foot of the mounts. Shortly after resuming the journey I noticed the familiar sight of white Nissan Bluebird was not in my rear vision mirror “Should we call them?” I asked, “Nar, they have a map and will call us if lost” navigator Haynes replied… Turns out the boys in the Nissan Bluebird decided to follow another Silva Legend that looked “identical” to our car… After an hour of driving and passing a sign indicating to Christchurch in the direction they were traveling the boys realised it was the wrong car and only then noted there was only ONE person in the Legend…

Whilst the Bluebird boys were making up for lost ground we stopped to have a look at the bungee bridge to the relief of some we just missed the last jump for the day… The boys looked much more relaxed walking back off the bridge!

When we arrived in Queenstown at 4 pm (6 hour journey), we checked into YHA Backpackers (hostel) quad share rooms with ensuite (shower and toilet), TV and access to a common room with kitchen and eating facilities (common room closed at 10pm each night).

Haynesy and I went for a explore of Queenstown discovering Steamer Wharf on Lake Wakatipu before the group settled in at Altitude bar for a few social ales, some group shots and frolicking with locals. As the night kicked on Steve D even decided to do some “pole” dancing…

Day 3: The Remarkables & Saturday Night in Queenstown (view photo set here)

Despite conditions being overcast and windy the crew decided to head to the snow. A decision to visit the Remarkables ski field first was made due to the better snow forecast and a reputation of being a good beginner field with a leaner slope and magic carpet located near base camp.

The drive up mountain was hair raisin! A narrow windy unsealed road with no barriers being the only route to base camp and stories of a car sliding off the edge road and rolling down the mountain the previous day that we heard at Altitude Bar were clearly in my mind as we negotiated the tricky road. We had stop a third the way up to put on snow chains on the car, were Haynesy got to add “supervisor” to his ever expanding CV!

We got to base camp at 10:30am in one piece, kitted up in our snow gear! A special mention to Stevie D who pulled his fathers retro “fitted” snow gear out of storage to cut a fashionable figure across the slopes! “And people thought the 70’s were dead!” A notable quote made later in the day by our board instructor Ben.

11:30am the group undertook our first snow boarding lesson lead ably by our instructor Ben “Happy Days!!!” In the first lesson Ben guided us though:
- Board Terminology
- Riding the magic carpet (shot 2)
- Leafing

I quickly learnt that the skill in snow boarding is control and stopping rather then standing and speed as in other sports like surfing and skateboarding. More on this in later…

1:00pm the group stopped for lunch, we dined at the eating facilities in the Remarkables base camp. We eat, attempted to dry some water logged gear and posed for a couple of group shots (shot 2). Before venturing back out to kit up and meet for lesson 2 at 2:00pm. Conditions turned pretty nasty as icicles grow on Stevie D exposed noise.

The boys looked on as Ben demonstrated with the help of another student Falling Leaf facing the slope. Lesson 2 continued to cover:
- Leafing continued
- Heel side and toe side turns
- Linking
Luke demonstrated the frustration that we all felt over the course of the day of watching what to do, Getting up and thinking you are doing it right and then crashing 10 meters later…

At the end of the lesson Ben rated us about a level 3 to 3.2 (not bad for 2 lessons work! Over achievers!!!) and we should have no problem taking on the mountain (green runs) in coming days!!! Happy Days!!!!
The lifts and magic carpets stop operating 4pm we spent all our first day on the slow zone slope a chair lift positioned just to the right of the slow zone conveniently in the line of sight always gave motivation!

The field closed shortly after 4pm the boys headed back to base camp to return our boards (shots 2 and 3) before making way back to car stopping along the way to for a few more group shots (shots 2 and 3).

Upon return to Queenstown the boys decided on Fergburger for dinner. Fergburger was the name of the hamburger shop in Queenstown that Haynesy and I discovered whilst exploring the town the previous day. Its reason for note was it was as popular as many of Queenstown bars with a 10-20 minute wait for each order. Ohing into our burgers (shot 2) in the YHA common room we discover what all the fan fare was about. We got to enjoy our meal with duty free alcohol with ample coke to mix it with thanks to a trip to the supermarket from Tom and Segar. For a pick me up after dinner and before hitting the town the boys went a few rounds of Jager bombs. This posed a few problems:

A. The Jagermeister was still in the car parked 1 km away due to a shortage of long term parking near the YHA
B. We need 7 shot glasses and Red Bull

To solve the problem Tom, Conrad and Haynes agree to the trip to the car via the supermarket to stock up on required ingredients and pick up the Jager. The boys returned 30 min later, Tom with a stern look on his face asking for the car keys. When reminded Tom he was the last to have car keys the look turned to embarrassment as he realised the keys are in his pocket along side his phone he could of use to call when at that car…

Successfully the boys returned with supplies, unable to find shot glass the boys purchased medicine plastic cups that had limited success… As the cups held more then 30ml they floated in the Red Bull…

Evicted from the common room at 10pm we headed across to the World Bar where the drink special was half price “tea pots”!?! Tea pots are cocktail mix’s served in a, you guessed it tea pot and shot glasses pour into. Any innuendo that may have arisen through six boys walking around withtea pots was made painfully obvious courtesy of Vi, Suemarie, Eileen and Maz (fellow tourists from Western Australia and Sydney) who pointed and yelled from across the bar, “that is sooo gay!!!” adding further embarrassment by taking photos to show their friends… We sat down swopped a story or two and enjoy a shot of tea (from Long Island)!!! The cocktails tasting very sweet and everyone keen to try at least one of each cocktail on the menu, table real estate become precious! As the night wore on I thought I impress the girls and others around with my engineering skill by constructing a shot glass pyramid! I am SOooo smooth I know!!! Note Conradical high interest level!!!

Vi and the girls were great company sharing many a story about their snow experiences, dancing competitions (won by pushing over their competition whilst the judges were not looking) and cashing in their resulting prize, a bungy jump from the Nevis platform highest in the world and something I never got the time/courage to do! Thanks for fun night and for sharing your photos!

Day 4: Jet Boating, Skyline Gondola & Luge Racing (view photo set here)

We woke to a bacon, egg, tomato and toast breakfast courtesy of Al and Conradical. In previous trips the group has awarded the title of Man of Trip (MOT) to a worthy member for their contributions to group enjoyment and (mostly) laughter. The boys received worthy MOT nomination for their efforts!!!

The breakfast was enjoyed by all and well timed with several trip members still feeling the effects of a big Saturday in Queenstown. The slow Sunday morning provided time for a few shenanigans… Haynesy sets a trap for an unwitting Tom and Segar wakes to find something growing on his chin.

Mid morning we headed down to Arthurs Point on the Shotover River for a trip in the Jet Boats. Arriving at 11am and the booking not until 11:30 left plenty of time for a group shot some clowning around and funny faces (photo 2) before getting suited up in some rain and safety jackets and boarding the boat. The ride lasted about 20 minutes along the Shotover River passing through the Shotover Canyons a highlight being 360۫ spin. The photos and video (video 2 onboard Jet Boat) describe it far better then I…

In the afternoon the group headed across to Skyline Gondolas which are a cable car ride up the mountain overlooking Queenstown where a Luge (French word for sled) track, bar/restaurant and lookout operate. Conrad, Steve D and I shared a gondola up the mountain with the Steve and myself admiring the view from the rear window of the gondola (photo 2 Steve and Conrad). Half way up the mountain Steve gets some altitude sickness… Whilst Steve and I were leaning against door posing for the photo the door started to open!!! About then we noticed the “well placed” sign on the bottom right hand door cautioning do not lean on doors…

Once on the mountain we grabbed a helmet (Tom finding his favourite) and headed across to the luge track noting the fire sign along the way, everything in New Zealand seems to be “extreme!” Stevie D demonstrated the art of tearing down a hill they call “luging” while Tom and I pose for a self portrait and taking in some of those Tomoramic views (photo 2 post card shot). Finally the group settled in for a beer at the bar before making our way back down the mountain.

In the evening Andrew the Heli-skier ($700 a day to have a helicopter take you up the mountain) who was sharing a room with Steve D , Luke and Conrad come out and joined us for dinner, “The Works” at Pizza Hut (we went high end!). After enjoying a few beers in the common room at YHA we hit the town starting at Altitude (in Queenstown for 3 days and already getting a local…) Tom kicked Segar in the head. After leaving Altitude Tom got the New Zealand fever befriending a local lass and a friendship blossomed. Struggling to find bar options in what was a somewhat more subdued Queenstown on a Sunday night we come across a bar with a lot of noise play Michael Jackson’s Blame It On The Boogie, we knocked on the door and was quickly ushered into a room filled with 40 + year olds stayed for a song, Stevie D and Conrad posed with a portrait of someone who could very well have been at the bar before leaving. We stopped at a half dozen other quiet bars whilst doing a lap of Queenstown before coming across a dress up party and cheap drinks at “Revolver” the bar next to the YHA! Getting in the dress up mood Steve D acquired a hat whilst Tom claimed he was an Aviator!

Day 5: Coronet Peak & Sunday Night in Queenstown (View photos set here)

Another early start 7:30am, breakfast at McDonalds before arriving at Coronet Peak at 9:30am the crew had kept our ski boots from Saturdays trip to the Remarkables but still had to stop past the ski hire to collect our boards (Tom, Luke, Conrad and Haynes at ski hire centre). With our confidence high after Bens “Happy Days” instructions from the lesson at the Remarkables the group decided to pass on our final lesson and headed straight to the “Meadows Chair” Lift to make mine and most of the groups way down our first ever snow run! The photo right was taken at the top of the Meadow Chair Lift at the start of our first run!
There were considerably more people at Coronet Peak then at the Remarkables and the wait for the chair lift took between 10-15 mins (though got better as the day went on).

My first run was somewhat of a challenge trying to negotiate my way down the mountain as slow as possible I got stuck on the outside of the first bend of the “Big Easy” run with the slope running the across the run I found it hard to get moving in the right/safe direction again… A story that I am embarrassed to tell but I am sure most people will hear a grossly exaggerated version (mostly probably from Pukey or “All Star” Haynes)! Once I got moving again I was a bit reluctant to stop and when a little girl age all of about 6 years old complete with a pink jump suit appeared about 10 meters in front of me I made a poor decision to take evasive action rather then wipe out…

The facts of the incident ARE THESE:

- I never actually hit the girl, rather “clipped” the rear of her skis

- The accident (which may or may not have been due to the clip) was exaggerated by the girl performing a perfect star shaped face plant complete with resulting snow puff rising after minor impact (or disaster???)…

- There were no witness, other then Pukey who is as blind a bat without his glasses (which he did not have) and Haynes and as anyone who has spent anytime with him would know he is completely preoccupied with “other” maters too pay any attention to anything other then himself and any members of the fairer sex in the immediate area…

In light of the above facts I have come to the conclusion that I was victim of a conspiracy between the little mumpskin, the mumpskins parents, the mountain staff and the forces above (possibly including God himself!!!) to make poor innocent Murph look like an evil ass…
May I put forward the theory that the slope of the mountain (shaped by the mountain staff and “forces above”) made avoiding the collision impossible then the mumpskin (trained by the parents) launched into an Oscar worthy dive/performance completing the attack! Any testimony from Haynes or Pukey should be omitted for reasons outlined above… No further comment is required or will be made on the matter, other then to say that as I was/am bigger then the girl, she should have gotten out of the away! :op

Over the course of the day everyone improved linking heal and toe side turns together and as confidence began to build we were riding up the walls of the slope and even took on “The M1” blue run! Meanwhile at the end of every run the group reconvened in the line waiting for the chair lifts and we took a few shots (shots 2, 3 and 4). The chair lifts at Coronet Peak were social with just you and one other lucky person to share the 7-10 minute ride with and take in views (shots 2, 3 and 4)!

In between runs Steve D, H and I found time to create a snow woman! She had a curvy figure but a bit of a icy personality!!! Ha ha… The new group member put some tension in the group first between Haynesy and myself and Haynesy and Al before Al stole a kiss and I snuck a huge!

At the end of the day we return to base for group and funny photos. Haynesy had a creative method to get back to the car park!

In the evening we returned to you guessed it Altitude for Karaoke night! We sang along to a few warm up tunes (shot 2) before hitting the stage and sing as a group “Summer of 69” and attempt a effort at “Mambo No. 5” both receiving a good reaction from the crowd. Andrew joined us out again and done a rather impressive solo version of “Proud Marry” or as I know it “Rolling on a River” that won him a $15 drink card! Thanks for a free round from Andrew!

Day 6: Back to The Remarkables & Winnies (View photo set click here)

Day 6 we went back to the Remarkables for our final day on the snow. We were comfortably linking turns and making our way down green runs. Two days earlier at the Remarkables we did not leave the beginner slope at the front of mountain base, now we were going up the Alta and Sugar Bowl Chair lifts and going down the Casterway, Easy Out and Altra green runs (ref to map).

In the evening being our final night in Queenstown we went for a group dinner at Winnies a gourmet pizza bar. Winnies was highly recommended from follow travellers and after sharing 5 pizzas amongst 7 people we can confidently agree Winnies is well deserving of its reputation. After dinner Conrad, the Steve’s and I went to the movies and Luke, Segar and Tom were keen for a beer. Whilst we were watching Miami Vice the boys befriended Maria the promiscuous Swede!

Day 7: Paragliding, Fergburgers & Return to Christchurch (view photo set here)
Before embarking on the drive back to Christchurch Stevie D, Conrad, Tom and myself decided to go for one last adrenaline rush, a tandem paraglide from Coronet Peak!!! It was hoped that we would jump of Coronet Peak second highest peak about 1600 meters above sea level. We got to the summit, took for a few Tomoramics! Tom was king of the world/Queenstown being first one to the top (photo 2) and then Al arrived! Tom got suited up and moved down the mountain and got into jump position whilst I took a nervous preflight picture with my tandem partner “Whiz” however the wind was too swirly to jump from the summit and we were forced back to the mountain base 1168 meters above sea level.
Again we had to wait for wind. After 20 minutes it did not look like we would be able to jump, then just as we began to de-rig the wind changed and we actually jumped!!!
I must admit there were butterfly’s before take off and as the instructors had advised that due to the wind conditions we would have to get a good amount of foot speed to get lift off the mountain when Whiz said run I went for it dragging him along and continued to do the running man for a good 2-5 meters after take off…
The ride down the mountain was tremendous with the thrill of jumping off the mountain to the feeling of weightlessness/floating and taking in some more of those views (shots 2, 3 and 4), the unexpected exhilaration and embarrassment I felt after questioning Whiz,”if we could go faster” and Whiz replying, “Oh you want to do aerobatics..” the following events lead to me screaming like a star struck school girl and the video below to the relief of touching down on solid ground!

Fast paragliding facts:
- Jumped from a height of 1168 meters above sea levels
- Traveled in a forward (horizontal direction) at approximately 40 Km/hour
- Descended at a rate of about 1 meter/second
- Landed outside Queenstown approximately 395 meters above sea level
- Total vertical jump distance 772 meters, the Rialto is 251 meters for prospective.

After landing and kissing the ground… Ok!!! I fall on my ass… I noticed that Tom had Maria (who had decided to tag along on the day events) to give him a huge, whilst I have Whiz to help me dust my ass off… Where did I go wrong?
After all 4 jumpers safely landed back on the ground we returned to town, dropped Maria off to meet some friends and headed to Fergs for a departure Fergburger and the “Big Al” Vs. “Big Mac” burger off! Critical states:
The Big Mac
Two all beef patties (1/4lb each), special source, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bum.
The Big Al
Double Serving of prime NZ beef (1/2 lb each), lashings of bacon,a whole lotta cheese, 2 eggs, beetroot, lettuce, red onion, relish and a big wad of aioli (garlic mayonnaise).
The Big Al is a truly a heavy weight whilst Big/little Mac looked like he had his work cut out for him…
If in any doubt over what a mammoth of a burger the Big Al is I let the photos speak for themselves:
Before the fight the crowd grows the anticipation! Burgers in robes/wrapping enter the ring/table, burgers de-wrap, *ding ding* the battle begins, Big Al moves in for the kill AND the winner is Big Al!!! Devouring Big Mac…
After the main event Stevie D and I had the job of trying to take on a Big Al in one sitting… The task was tough as the following photos (pics 2, 3 and 4) will show note the look in Stevie D eyes as he takes his first bite!
Note, I thought availability of “Fergburger” female underwear at the store was a tasteful touch!
We then undertook the road trip back to Christchurch made it back at about 8pm before going for a drive into a quiet CBD, walked the club stretch stopped in at what seemed to be the only place open, a Chinese restaurant for tea and returned to the hotel for a night cap.

Day 8: Christchurch & Plane Ride Home (view photo set here)

Our last morning in New Zealand we explored the Christchurch CBD, I noted it was a picturesque city with an English cottage/village feel centering around a town style city square, "Cathedral Square" where there was a mid week craft/tourism market. Turns out as advised by a city host the town was designed to be a southern hemisphere outpost of the Church of England (hence the English feel) and is a sister city to Adelaide designed by the same town planner, I am yet to travel to Adelaide so can not make the comparison. The eye catching structure that we took a group photo in front of is the "Chalice" it was built to celebrate the new millennium and the 150th anniversary of the founding of Christchurch. The Chalice is a cone shaped mosaic of all the native leaves of New Zealand.
In the afternoon we made our way to the airport stocked up on more duty free alcohol two 1 liter bottles allowed into Australia. The new alcohol left us with the problem of what do to with the open alcohol left over from trip… The answer??? Drink as much as possible over lunch at the airport and carry the rest onto the plane mixed with coke, "waste not want not..." The plane trip home was entertaining playing “Up the River Down the River” a card game Andrew had taught us which lead to some funny photos (photo 2) and some group photos (could we have found Stevie D lost twin???).